Okay. So some of you may have noticed that I post less and less on this thing and hardly ever comment.
First, this doesn't necessarily mean that I don't read your journal.
This does mean that I am less and less motivated to make my personal life public through the internet. I don't have a twitter, I only have a myspace so I can view other peoples photo's and facebook is just a way to find out what my refuses-to-call-but-is-on-facebook-every-d
I feel guilty for not commenting, for not updating, for not posting pictures.
But whenever I am behind the computer on lj for a long period of time, I feel guilty that I haven't used that time to do something more fun, more productive, more creative, or less back pain inducing than sitting in front of a screen for hours on end.
I have deleted everyone I don't read or just skim.
I have deleted the consumer or fashion oriented communities I was a member of.
Livejournal is not worth 20 dollars so I can't make all my older posts private, but if anyone knows how I can do this without having a paid account, tell me please.
Maybe I'll post something again, maybe I won't. We all know 'nothing ever ends', but for now, don't be looking out for me.
Everyone I have left in my friendslist, I find interesting. If I don't comment, 90% of the time it's because I'm a lazy bitch and I'd rather talk to you face to face than through a machine. Sorry. 10% of the time it's because I don't agree with what you wrote/are doing with your life and don't want to start an argument because I am slowly starting to discover that my opinions don't matter and I can't change people. So there's just no point in me trying to talk to you about your drug problem/eating disorder/heartache over some asshole who doesn't deserve you/etc. I am trying to see this not as a weakness of character, but as becoming more accepting and tolerant, uncarmenish as that may sound.
If you'd rather not have a friend on your list who doesn't comment, by all means tell me.
If you would like to write to me and be written to, leave your address as a comment. (Comments are screened) I miss writing and having people to write to might make me write more than just college notes :)
I wish you all the love you deserve,
Carmen.
Current Mood: contemplative
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